Signs Your Site Was Hacked by Dumb Guys

* They brag about stealing all the software off your site, www.freeware.com.

* "Feedback on my hacking? E-mail me at the address below."

* The end of their political message reads, "This hack best viewed with Internet Explorer 4.0 or above."

* HTML-impaired vandals resort to TP'ing your server.

* After hacking in, improved security so much they felt compelled to turn themselves in.

* Their lone devious act of "vandalism" was to correct all your spelling errors.

* When eBay comes back online, the entire auction consists of a bunch of Dungeons and Dragons crap being sold by four geeks in Poughkeepsie.

* "GREG W. BUSH FOR PRESIDENT! GREG W. BUSH FOR PRESIDENT!"

* The KKK logo they left uses white letters on a white background.

* Pamela Lee has clothes on now.

* "pHaNtOm" tried to disable your retail website by using his American Express platinum card to purchase your entire inventory.

* Today's topic looks a wee bit suspicious: "DA ToP5 R33ZUNZ Y DA S1LV3R SURF3R PoSS3 RooLZ!!!!!"

* Someone broke into your credit card database and stole 400,000 middle initials.

* Hacked into www.Playboy.com just to read the articles.

and the Number 1 Sign Your Website Was Hacked by Dumb Guys...
* Calls himself "Dr. Evil" and demands that he will unleash an attack on the entire world and bring the internet to a screeching halt unless he receives "$100, in small bills."